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10 Things you don’t want your bank to say to you

The financial world is undergoing dufficult times at the moment. Here are some things you probably do not want your bank to say to you:

1. We used your money to redecorate our CFO's condo.
2. I'm sorry, we don't seem to have an account with that number.
3. Are you sure you have an account with our bank?
4. So you want to withdraw some money... Can I write you a cheque?
5. We had to cancel all savings accounts due to a reorganisation. But the money came in handy.
6. You want to put money into your account? With our bank? Really?
7. We have transfered the money in your accounts to our affiliate in Katmandu. Yes, you do have to show your id there in person.
8. No, this isn't a bank, this is a grocery... Always been a grocery... yep... sorry.
9. You want your money in dollars? We had a good deal on Polish slottis; that's all we have now.
10. When I count to 10, will you be gone then?

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